Make University a boiler room = 100% pay raise


Some time back, I mentioned Arizona State University’s plan to increase faculty workloads 25%, for no additional pay. This policy idea was part of a larger plan by the ASU Poo Bah, Michael Crow, to debase education as much as possible.

The primary motivation for doing so is to get more money for administration—every dollar not spent on education is another dollar for admin, after all. I know, there are those who believe the dumbing down of higher education is part of a master plan, and I certainly can’t prove that not to be the case, but it’s very clear that simple greed is a factor here so allow me to focus on what I can show.

I feel it’s worthwhile to mention just how helpless faculty are in the face of this debasement. I assure you, faculty have protested turning ASU into a boiler room, with complaints and “no confidence” votes a’plenty. Surely, making all the workers so unhappy would have repercussions, right? Where might we see them?

You sure won’t find them in Crow’s paycheck.

The Chronicle of Higher Education has a helpful table of Poo Bah compensation at public institutions; it’s well worth consideration. We see that in 2015, Crow’s compensation was a mere $701,000—this includes a $40,000 bonus, but probably misses quite a few perks that serfs can only dream of. We might find out about all the extra pay later, but for now let’s just take this at face value.

Still, that’s not awesome pay, it doesn’t even put him in the top 20. Let’s zip forward a year, where his compensation is a jaw-dropping $1,554,058, including a $150,000 bonus. Completely discounting “other” compensation in there, is anyone else scoring pay raises like this? Does it bother the taxpayers of Arizona even a little that not only is their money going to hurt their children, the one doing the hurting is profiting so mightily?

In addition to debasing education, these guys are hired to grow the student base. But…our schools are finally losing students. So Crow is getting this raise despite failure and committing atrocities. Besides, that kind of huge pay raise is not so extraordinary for a Poo Bah.

Consider the most recent year’s #2 Poo Bah for pay, William McRaven. His compensation was a mere $1,500,000 (including a $300,000 bonus). I feel bad for him, his pay the previous year was a lousy $1,090,000. Only a crappy 50% increase in pay? Man, it must be tough to suffer like that.

Still pay raises are pretty good in Arizona and Texas. How about Florida? The Poo Bah at University of Florida earned a mere $505,000 a couple years ago. Not much by today’s standards. He clearly complained to the Trustees, and they gave him a bump, doubling his compensation to $1,102, 862.

Goodness, another doubling of pay. Perhaps he’d been there a long time, and this was just a long overdue pay raise? Nope, Poo Bah McVulture Fuchs is relatively new hire, coming to campus in 2015. I promise the gentle reader, no actual educator in Florida received a 100% pay raise.

When I get a pay raise, it’s around 2%, and it’s always merit-based. I have to be doing very well at my job to get 2%. So, if this guy is scoring a 100% raise, he must be quite awesome. I have to be curious what amazing things are occurring under this guy’s leadership to justify the bonus plunder. Thank goodness for Google:

Enormous sex scandal envelopes the University of Florida

By the standards of Penn State, it wasn’t that enormous. Their Title IX coordinator (you know, the person supposed to control sexual harassment and discrimination) was, well, engaging in inappropriate behavior with university money:

 “…he also bought pornographic videos with titles that included erotic torture and rough sex, cyborg sex, threesome sex and more.”

As I’ve documented many times, when administrators get caught like this, it’s no big deal, they just move on and up. Sure enough the pervy anti-sexual harassment guy, Loschiavo, landed another plum position in short order:

Loschiavo was recently hired as the Title IX coordinator of Florida Polytechnic University. His UF supervisor, Jen Day Shaw, gave him an effusive recommendation.

–Shaw’s salary was nearly 180k a year, by the way, and her title was University of Florida Dean of Students and Associate Vice President for Student Affairs. She’s moved on and up as well…

You know the leader of UF could show a little integrity here and warn the next school that, maybe, this guy isn’t a good choice for a position where sexual decency is a requirement. Does anyone suspect the new job is payoff to keep quiet about the extent of corruption? This type of thing happens so often that it really is time to ask some hard questions. Once might be a fluke, but time and again? C’mon, there’s gotta be a real reason…does Florida Polytechnic not know about the internet? Granted, FP figured it out eventually on their own, so I guess it’s ok.

So, the Poo Bah has a serious sex scandal here, anything else happening at UF? Maybe the Poo Bah is noted for fiscal responsibility, justifying handing a ridiculous amount of money over to him, and then doubling it. Let’s look at some more news under his reign:

UF’s top lawyer resigns, will get $175K severance

Keith, one of UF’s senior administrators under UF President Kent Fuchs, has been on paid administrative leave since April because of the investigation.

Hmm, top lawyer resigns, and the Poo Bah hands her a big bonus on the way out. Am I really the only person on the planet with a suspicious mind? When I resign from an institution, even with a perfect record, I get…nothing. Anyone else out there get a huge cash bonus for saying “I quit” while under investigation for possible criminal behavior?

I keep mentioning how perks can really add to the compensation. It’s not just the Poo Bah who gets great perks, consider what this lawyer gets:

The $175,000 severance includes $10,000 to relocate from Gainesville and a payment of $50,000 reflecting two full years of service under her 2014 contract. Her annual salary was $389,500 plus a $10,000 car allowance. When Keith was hired in 2006 she also got $7,500 a year to pay for her son’s private school tuition.

any taxpayers even a little insulted by a state school paying its employees not to get a state education for their kids?

Ok, we have a sex scandal and a lawyer scandal with a big payola. Any other scandals? Sure:

University Of Florida Announces SALE On Academic Scientists: Buy One, Get One FREE!

Ok, the above is a parody site, but the core idea is correct, as UF scientists were selling out their academic integrity to sing praises of Monsanto.

I don’t understand, in my career in higher education, every time the school has even the tiniest bit of success, the Poo Bah rushes in to claim full credit for it, and that credit always merits rewards. But don’t any of these little failures, at least one of which is clearly tied to the Poo Bah, put even a slight damper on that huge pay raise? If truly none of these scandals have even the slightest bit to do with the Poo Bah, why do we even need him? These scandals affect administration, legal, and academics at UF, so what does the Poo Bah here do, exactly, if he’s not involved in any of that?

Well, at least he’s kept sportsball there free of scandal, right?

NCAA suspends Florida QB Will Grier for a year over banned substance

 Oh, never mind, then. Seriously what are we paying these guys for?

The gentle reader should understand that I’m not picking on these three different schools in three different states. I only chose to pick state schools because all these shenanigans are financed through tax dollars, either by the states involved or by the student loan scam. Much of higher education is run like these schools, they are not particularly special, really.

Please keep the above in mind the next time tuition and fees are raised due to budget considerations…there’s plenty of money in the system, but it’s all going to the top, every time.